Postcards from Kronk - the second collection of daily stories. (2025)

Xin Wei in court for his divorce proceedings was the first to blame milk for his unfaithfulness, the perverse logic of increasing his energy and libido past levels one woman could contain made the local press. Within a week Xin became a figure of fun across Jilin City. When a second man claimed that he too had been forced into the arms of another by excessive milk intake appeared, this was reported with great scepticism but after the regional television station ran the story and received over 4 thousand texts from other men and women in two hours questions began to be asked. All dairies in Northeast China were closed whilst samples were tested before the Authorities stated there was 'no foreign bodies' in the milk. With this assurance the dairies were reopened and demand has rocketed. Three months on milk sales are up by 36% and still rising. Xin Wei himself has denied any involvement in the Dairy business and is currently working his way thr...

Oh boy, the cigarette marks left on the maps certainly changed both geographical and aeronautical history. Philip manged to fly his harrier through the gaps between bakerloo and the feature on gypsy marriages, good on him.

The Tomahawk is a particular weapon, unique in it's use by a single cultural group, the Native Americans. When thrown from a distance of 6 to 30 feet it is deadly. I am very skilled in Tomahawk throwing. The man we accuse is at most 8 feet away. He untied his wrists without us noticing but continues to sit there smiling at us, waiting for us to make the next step. We should respect other peoples cultures he says and deep down we all know that. Normally someone would cave his head in right now but no one does. If he is telling the truth then we should worry what will happen when the others arrive : he is telling the truth I can feel it. When five Seminole Indian men went to search for the great Spirit Above they fell off the edge of the world and were put in a pot and cooked, surviving only as men angels, I don't want that to happen so I put down my tomahawk and leave.

St Malcolms Hospice for the Lame and Needy was only twenty minutes by car which meant I could grab a bite to eat on the way, although I wish now this had come from a real shop. I remember sitting in the lobby waiting to be called in, trying hard to swallow the last chunk of donut that had become awkwardly lodged in my throat, this was my 14th interview and coughing up part masticated pastry product was unlikely to ensure it would be my last. Nothing had gone particularly to plan so far, I was having trouble reading my prepared cue cards, it had been a mistake to use the green biro especially on the lilac paper : to say thank you to an aunt for record voucher it would be a fine choice but in this light I needed more contrast. "Gryff ?" I got up at the sound of my name and followed the voice through the large doors, concentrating on making my face look relaxed, friendly but professional. "Hello, please take a seat, would you like a glass of water?" I nodded m...

The omelette never got made. The phone number hidden in the giant hen that contained the eggs should never have been left there; the excuse that she made would have been better left unsaid and the ceramic leek with a grotesque face should not have been the weaker object when thrown at his head from such a distance. She wasn't hungry anymore.

Two tigers on the window sill, one empty, the second untouched; Ross wondered whether this was significant, it was one of those cases where you looked for clues anywhere you could find them. The kitchen he stood in was stripped bare of all free standing furniture as were the majority of the other rooms; they'd seen that as soon as the door had been put through : the staircase rammed full of chairs, tables, chests of drawers, anything substantial that could be used as a barricade was there. It had taken them fifteen minutes to work their way upstairs, dismantling and passing back furniture as they did, only to be greeted with more impossible structures upstairs blocking any route into or out of the small bedroom. The phone call hadn't been specific but it had been enough to warrant an investigation. There was something in the vagueness that was more unsettling, Ross and Manoj had got there first but neither understood what they were dealing with. The first b...

Everything is fine now. She would be smiling. She would be laughing at us now, here. She turns my lips into a smile as I remember. Keeping me in line, in check. My wife, my mother, my daughter. Everything is fine now. Now everything is fine.