Train guards and the ones that sell sandwiches have reacted nervously to the news that, following a series of unsuccessful trials in East Anglia, Hampstead and Manchester the minister for public platitudes has confirmed anyone with an electronic device or annoying tone of voice will be required to be seated in a specific carriage from Monday 20th June. Based on the sink class principal of failing schools this new ideology of our erratic leadership shows no sign of slowing down with government officials already touting separate staircases for people who broadcast how early they got up in the morning and compulsory river dips for men who attempt to grow a beard without the necessary testosterone to pull it off.
You voted for them and it’s your fault.
