March 25 Spam Kings sought after takedown

Up from the 36 chambers they came, all black and gold, bats and slacks: Spam Kings, the last gang on the estate, alone in their dominion, eating doritos and ordering pizzas.

Our village has been plagued by trouble recently; crude graffiti, disappearing milk and newsagent walk offs and finally we've had enough. That was why we called them.

If you want to beat a cancer you have to become a cancer Thomas said, he had contacts that could help us in ways the police had been unable to.

That was how how we got in touch with them.

The initial meeting between the members of the village society and representatives of the Spam Kings was cordial I'd say. We have more in common than I'd initially thought, we all like Jazz and Coke for a start and it was easy to agree the improvements we wish for our community.

They start work tomorrow, I imagine it will only take a day or two.