Postcards from Kronk - the second collection of daily stories. (2025)

The stench almost obliterated Mayor Murray's words of reassurance. "Thank you for standing by me in these dark days " Murray raises his hands aloft, presidential style to indicate Victory, unwittingly knocking out a pair of supporters whose bodies are quickly carried off by his staff. " The finest medical minds have examined me and concluded that the odour I am emanating is no longer pungent but is in fact, fragrant and is due to an over active benevolent gland " The crowd aren't sure they're being told the whole truth but applaud anyway, at least it's progress. " In the coming days I will distribute a pamphlet explaining all but for now..." he chops the air karate style and music blasts out from the giant speakers, " let's dance".

Roy stared at the monitor and waved at his son. Though Roy junior had been unable to be born he was developing quite nicely, obviously a little cramped but the doctors had assured them that he would rapdily catch up as soon as he was born - ' he's like a goldish in a bowl at the moment and you know how big fish get in the ocean '. Linz squeezed Roys hand and asked how Roy junior was, she couldn't see the screen from where she lay and the operations to give Roy junior room to grow severely limited her movement. " He's fine love, he's playing with that YoYo we gave him, just think in a month or two he'll be out " " I don't know how I'll do without him " his wife looked away and the pressure on his hand loosend for a moment before returning double strength. " But we'll have such fun together won't we Roy, me you and Roy junior " " Yes my love, of course we will " The consultant nodded and patted the ...

Right then - time to choose, take a look through into the dark mirror - buckle up and listen to body responses, your neurons and atoms colliding, dividing. Each scene more graphic than the last, each crime more unforgettable, each body less recognisable. Choose three for your picture round Bamber and I'd advise you to do so quickly as they get worse.

Tino the terrier gave John a reproachful look, the book signings and personal appearances were beginning to take their toll on both of them. Since learning Greek and publishing his autobiography 'The Tail that Reads Itself' Tino's simple life had become a public spectacle. He'd give anything to be running in a field or chewing an old peice of twig rather than sitting behind this desk, looking past the red cordon, the line of fans seemed to stretch for miles. "And if you think we're going to Korea ..." he didn't need to say anymore: John turned his head to the floor knowing he'd done wrong.

Mango McMurray grinned and passed round his first trophy. He'd been so sly, like a ninja in a blazer, a little diversion and then Wham ! In like flynn. There were six of them, all quiet now, passing the pastel coloured handful round, holding it up to their noses, dramatically breathing in the smell of girl. That no one mentioned they'd all started with the scented erasers was to the groups credit, that they had a secret club dedicated to stealing things from girls was not.

Koji Takeru stands up and adjusts his tie before addressing the House of Representatives, the lower and more powerful house of the National Diet of Japan. This is the moment of truth, his second ever speech but one that will go down in history. " Fellow members, as junior minister for energy I have been entrusted with identifying alternative power sources to see Japan into the next millennium, a quest that has taken me to every corner of our blessed archipelago and I am pleased, no, excited, honoured even to say I have unearthed something that will truly change our plans. What I am about to show you is, I believe, what the westerners call a game changer " The lights go down and a blurry video begins playing on the large screen. " What you are seeing is the inside of a cave system deep within the sea walls of Shikoku, the entrance of which was opened up by the recent earthquake, this cave system is new to mankind but look, on the wall there, a switch - I am about...

There are always stranger things if you look hard enough, stare into the sun and you'll see galaxies forming, look here, now, what do you see? Lightning flash panther stealth mode attack, from the left, two three. She turns and boxes open up one on top of another, a sharks head : a hammerhead the boy responds opening up the satchel of doom. Still smiling from under her fringe she unleashes pure carnage, everything happens at once : flying creatures weave in and out of the smoke, beaks open like mousetraps and waves of pure sonic energy blast open the boys reinforced hyper defences. The super injunction ruptures, his remaining troops exposed, the fold is opening. Measure him up and fetch the boxman the resurgent army of ants chant, smiling up to the girl. This is all happening now, it’s just in tiny tiny world, somewhere inside a jar left forgotten.